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  • Mod Movie Monday: Barbarella, 1968

    Posted on November 30th, 2009 "Tiki Chris" Pinto 4 comments

    mod-movie-mondaysI’ve decided to start something new here at the Tiki Bar. MOD MOVIE MONDAY is where all you hipsters can get hip to some crazy, far-out flicks from the ’50s, ’60s and ’70s. Some you’ll know well, some you’ll never have heard of. I’ll post a new one every Monday, or every-other Monday, or at least when I remember to…and will have them all under the keywords “Mod Movie Mondays” so as time goes by you can just search that and get the whole list! Now, they won’t always be “Mod”, some might be “groovy” or just “cool”, but I needed a name for it and this is what stuck. So, without further ado…

    Mod Movie Monday for November 30, 2009:

    Barbarella (Queen of the Galaxy) 1968barbarella-on-rug

    I started with the most mod movie I could think of, the classic psychedelic space fantasy starring the beautiful Jane Fonda. The story is based on the comic book heroin who lives on a planet of peace and love, where war is non-existent. But not everything is rosy in this future world…the brilliant scientist Durand-Durand (yes, that’s where the band got their name) has gone missing, and this kat possesses the knowledge to create a great weapon, one that threatens the peaceful gig that Barbarella’s future Earth enjoys. She is chosen to find the scientist, destroy the machine, and bring him back to Earth. Along the way she discovers a lot of groovy things (especially about sex) that she didn’t know existed, and shows plenty of skin while doing it.

    If you haven’t seen this flick, check it out. I give it a 10 on the Mod scale, for a plethora of reasons, including:

    Barbarella

    Barbarella

    • Grooviest opening sequence ever, with Barbarella floating in zero gravity while stripping her space suit off. Not only is she a honey, her spaceship has shag carpeting. The titles arrange themselves to carefully hide most of her nakedness, an idea that Mike Meyers used in his Austin Powers movies. The title song is sooooo ’60s that 3 minutes into the film you’ll think you’ve gone back in time. The song is performed by the Bob Crew Generation, the same hipsters that gave us the quintessential version of “Music to Watch Girls By”.

    barbarella-poster• Barbarella’s Space Ship looks like a vintage card shoe.

    • Very ’60s looking sets, including obviously hand-painted backdrops, vividly colored oil & water mixes as special effects, and far out costumes.

    • Woman-eating dolls and attack parakeets.

    • Barbarella’s on-board computer looks like a wall of post-it notes.barbarella-sleep-chamber

    • An angel, ray guns, hollow leather men, creepy twins, Essence of Man, sex pills, fantasy dream chamber and the Excessive Machine.

    • Groovy music throughout

    • Great lines like, “I’ve got to get rid of this tail”.

    barbarella-dollsNow remember kids, this movie was intentionally campy. There’s more cheese on this set than there is in Switzerland, but that’s the charm of it. It’s funny, silly, sexy and kool. I think a lot of people today just wouldn’t “get it”, but if you’re reading Tiki Lounge Talk, you definitely will. There was talk about a remake coming out, originally conceptualized with Rose McGowen in the lead with Robert Rodriguez directing. No offense to Rose, I think she’s a doll, but I don’t see her as the innocent girl-next-door type, and I think Rodriguez would have made it much too edgy and rough. And bloody. And he’d  probably throw in a couple of vampires. Apparently the studio thought so too, and the project’s on hold. Anyway it goes, if they do a remake it will never live up (or down) to the standards of the original: a krazy-art-and-drugs-inspired project that was born out of the psychedelic ’60s.

    What to drink while digging this flick:
    There’s actually a drink called the Barbarella: 2 oz. Sambuca, 1 oz. Cointreau, shake and pour over the rocks in an old fashioned glass. If that’s not your taste, I’d suggest a CC & Ginger on the rocks.

    Combine all the ingredients in a shaker filled with ice, shake and strain into an old fashioned glass.

    (Details & Trivia on IMDB Here)

    1968_barbarellabarbarella_angel

    barbarella-2barbarella-shh

    barbarella-orgasma1barbarella-orgasma2

  • New Tiki Drink Recipe! The Pirate’s Wench, aka Cap’n Mack’s Pirate Grog

    Posted on November 28th, 2009 "Tiki Chris" Pinto 1 comment

    tiki-bar-drinksThanksgiving for most people means a day spent with family, eating and watching football. Well, as we are displaced 1200+ miles from any family, my wife and usually have an intimate Thanksgiving dinner at home, just the two of us. This year was no exception, and we had a great day with a smoked turkey and the Wizard of Oz. If I have anything to be thankful for, it’s my wonderful wife Colleen.

    Of course when you have a few days off in a row without needing to tend to guests, you start experimenting at the Tiki bar, right? Well, I sure as hell do. And I came up with something pretty decent.

    tiki-drink

    I love rum. I love Coke. I love rum and Coke. Cuba Libre, as it’s know when you add lime. What I really like is to screw around with the basic recipe, and see what happens. That’s how I invented the Pirate’s Wench (click to see post). This little number is a spin-off of the Wench. It starts out the same, then takes a very islandy, Tiki-y twist. So we can call this a wench, too. What the hell. And it’s reeeeealy, reeeeally kickin’, kids! Try it out, it won’t disappoint.

    1 oz Sailor Jerry Rum
    1 oz Malibu Coconut Rum
    1 oz Dark Rum (I prefer Meyer’s)
    3 drops bitters
    1/4 teaspoon vanilla
    sprinkle of nutmeg
    Coke
    Lime

    Start with a shaker of ice, add the three rums, bitter, and vanilla. Shake it up, baby. Strain into a large Tiki mug filled with ice. Liquor should fill mug about half way. Fill with Coke, squeeze in juice of 1/4 lime, and two shakes of nutmeg, stir. Top with a little more nutmeg and lime wedge. Damned good grog! It you like it sweet, add a little pineapple juice to taste. If you like it super strong, add a 151 floater, if you dare. Avast! And May Ye Enjoy The Captain’s Private Stock!

  • Happy Thanksgiving From The Tiki Bar!

    Posted on November 26th, 2009 "Tiki Chris" Pinto No comments

    thanksgiving-cartoon-censorIt’s Turkey Day! Go wish your favorite turkeys a Happy Thanksgiving!

    No long post today, just a Happy Thanksgiving to you all, and some random wackyness to make the season bright!

    • The First Thanksgiving was held in 1621 by the Pilgrims, who were thankful their leaky boat didn’t sink. They celebrated with popcorn, pretzel rods, jelly beans and toast.

    • I tried to get some info on a Traditional Hawaiian Thanksgiving feast. Silly me, Hawaii didn’t even become a state until 1959. As far as I can tell, Hawaiians have turkey and poi, on the beach under a palm tree. Not too shabby.

    • Smoking a turkey and quitting smoking cold turkey are two different things.

    • If you drink enough rum, even the worst Thanksgiving cooking will taste great!

    • Lyrics of my favorite Thanksgiving song as a kid, sung to the toon of Polly-Wally-Doodle:

    “Oh a Turkey Tom and a Turkey Mom go Gobble Gobble Gobble all the day,
    oh they love to mix with the ducks and chick and Gobble Gobble Gobble all the day.

    Arm and arm, on the farm, as they strut their merry way,
    Oh a Turkey Tom and a Turkey Mom go Gobble Gobble Gobble all the day”

    Happy Thanksgiving!

    Don’t be a dumbass…don’t drink and drive.

  • Festival Antique Car Show, Pompano, FL Nov. 22, 2009

    Posted on November 22nd, 2009 "Tiki Chris" Pinto No comments

    car-club-tikiToday my wife and I drove up to Pompano, FL to meet our buddy Patrick at the Festival Flea Market Antique Car Show. Man, did they have some nice rides! My favorite had to be the 1960 Imperial Crown, in original Rose Pink, complete with push-button tranny. Colleen really dug the ’67 Cobra, and Patrick liked the ’64 Lincoln 4 door convertible, mildly pimped with 22″ rims and custom speaker system seamlessly built into the trunk. I can go on and on about the cars, but I know you really just want to see some kool pix so here goes…

  • How to be a Hipster in 1958: Read COOL Magazine, Man!

    Posted on November 18th, 2009 "Tiki Chris" Pinto 3 comments

    cool-man-cool Don’t be a four-corner square, Jack. You want to know what all the Cool kids are doing? They’re hip to COOL Magazine, America’s Coolest Teenage Rag!

    COOL Magazine, March 1958 Issue
    COOL Magazine, 1958. Don’t be a turkey, click on the snapshots to peep them nice and big

    This copy my Mama bought new in 1958. It features a spread on George Burns’ son, Ronnie, plus Platter Party ideas, cool threads for tigresses, and a scribble on how to lay down a kickin’ kiss.

    But my fave part of this rag mag is the Hipster’s Dictionary. Man, any zotep zombie can be a real keen jelly bean if they read this magazine! Just memorize a few hip phrases like “let’s buzz around the barrel” (let us partake in the eating of food) or “Let’s take a treat on the main beat” (let us congregate where all the ‘in’ people are) and you’ll go from a moldy-minded miser to a zoolie hipster with the most in a flash, Jack! There are several pages from A to Z of hipster lingo, plus a few columns of phrases so you’ll be really in the know.

    Now, I want you kats and kittens to knock me your peepers for a few ticks, while I lay down this jazz. And when you get to a mugshot you dig, click on it, and it will blow up to actual size so you can read the feed without flippin’ your wig, dig?

    COOL Magazine: The Hipster’s Dictionary, Definition of Hip, Hep & Hipster

    Hipster's Dictionary, definition of Hip, Hep & Hipster

    There are a lot of kats who zonk out over hip, hep, hep cat and hipster. Well, here’s the definitions straight from the source, the Cool Mag Hipster’s tome from 1958:

    “HEP: An archaic word meaning “in the know”, replaced by “Hip”.

    HEP CATS: Cats & Kittens who read this this publication*

    HIP: Up to date, cool. A person who knows what’s going on. Replaces the word “Hep”.

    HEP CAT: Hip Cat and Hep Cat not used very often. Replaced by the word “Hipster”.

    HIPSTER: A cool cat or kitten who knows what’s going on.”

    *They meant COOL Magazine. I mean Tiki Lounge Talk, dig?

    So, essentially, you’d be a real Hep Cat for reading COOL magazine, and that would automatically make you hip, but a Hipster would never be called Hep because he’d be too hip for hep, are you hip to this jazz? Groovy. So what that means is that even in 1958, swing-era Hep Cats were still considered cool Jives. And since jive changes with the ages, we kool bachelor-pad-type hot-roddin’ Tiki bar-boozin’ Swingers can feel free to lay down our riffs with hip, hep, or whatever the hell we want without flippin’ anyone’s wig, dig? Fantabulous!

    COOL Magazine…How to Plan a Successful Platter Party

    Cool Magazine...How to have a Platter Party

    Now, I know all you kids out there really want to have a cool party like the one in the photo, with your beer-guzzling teenage brother (on the left) and funny-looking nine-year-old cousin who whines a lot. Well, our prayers have been answered. Angela, the swingin’ tigress Special Interests Editor at COOL Magazine, has laid down a scribble with all you need to know. She hits on such important subjects as having hot spaghetti with your pizza, giving little prizes like dented hubcaps, and making sure you have plenty of groovy records of Rock ’n’ Roll, Bop & Lindy to dance to. She is also very sure to pepper the article with lots of jive terms from the Hipster’s Dictionary. Imagine that!

    COOL Magazine: Fashions for Spring & Summer, 1958

    cool-fashions-1958

    Those of you who are into retro and vintage clothing will flip for this. Our friend Angela once again graces us with her far out knowledge of what hip kittens want. But this time she drops the jive and writes like she’s got a byline in Harper’s. In fact, the whole spread looks sorta out of place in this rag. You’d think COOL Magazine would have spread with dolls dressed in Capris and off-the-shoulder tops, or blue jeans and leather jackets. Or black sweaters and thigh-high boots. Or, I dunno, leopard leotards. Anyway, if you click on the image you can blow it up to read all about it. Can you say “early product placement”?

    COOL Magazine: Part of the spread on cover boy Ronnie Burns

    cool-mag-ronnie-coverboy-sp

    This kid actually got a 16-Page spread in this issue of COOL. Imagine one star getting that much print today, huh? Especially since he was an aspiring star, the son of George Burns and Gracie Allen. (If you don’t know who they are, well, you better Google ’em). Even with all this press he never really made stardom, but he gave us a great bunch of pix that show how a cool boy of the late 50′s should be. See him working on his Corvette sports car (I suspect that’s the first time he saw under a hood in his life), clean his gun, read on the patio, swim, play ping-pong with his shirt nicely tucked in, and go Christmas shopping with his mother…just like…eh…all the…um…cool kids…yeah. (Why ain’t he smoking?)

    record-jamboreeFun Advertisements in COOL Magazine

    This rag is riddled with ads, as you might guess. Of course Marketing was in its baby stages in the ’50s, so they still didn’t really have the whole “We cater to the teenage crowd” mindset just right, just yet. 20-towels-ad

    This allowed for fantastic placement of ads for things like “Record Jamboree”, featuring hit albums of Polkas, Honky Tonk Piano, and Ragtime…you know, the stuff hip teenagers love to listen to. Or maybe the ever-popular “20 Towels for 5¢ Each”; that’ll have the kids sending cash and stamps by the handful. Of course there are a few ads that make sense, like those for losing weight (even in the ’50s) and subscribing to one or more of the publisher’s mags. Then I came across two jewels, two ads that made my day. The first was an ad for the “Magic Art Reproducer”, the second for “40 Model Cars”. I flipped like a burger when I saw these, because, in my collection of junk, I have these little trinkets, on display in my home. I don’t have all 40 of the bouncy rubber cars, but I have the caddy that’s in the ad. It’s times like this – going through a 50+ year old magazine that my mother kept all her life and gave to me, then finding ads for stuff that was fun, cheap stuff then, but are hard to find collectibles now, and knowing I have some of that junk (some of those toy cars I’ve had since I was a kid, and they were old then) – it’s times like this that I just have to sit back and say, “Wow, baby. That is some far out, frantic jazz.”

    Ad for the Magic Art Reproducer, and the actual one I have at home.

    Cool Magainze Ad - Draw Any Person With Our Gizmo

    magic-art-reproducer

    Ad for Rubber Toy Cars, and a shelf in my home with six of those cars.

    Cool Magazine Ad - 40 Toy Cars for a Buck

    model-cars-rubber